Sometimes, it is fantastic to meet people you haven’t seen for many, many years, especially if they had an important role in your life. Because they show you how much you have – or have not – changed during this time.
Few days ago, I met an “affair” I haven’t seen in (something like) 10 years. I really liked him a lot back then, and he – he just preformed an expensive mating ritual, had sex with me and disappeared (kind of).
He hasn’t changed. Back then, I liked guys who looked like young English lords. Extremely stylish, sleek and classic. Men who were never young.
I have changed. Back then, I was what in Austria you would call a “tussi” – very stylish and always fun. We met in the most posh bar in Vienna.
This time, it couldn’t have been more different – I asked him to accompany me to a discussion at the university. He was so out of place there, it was cute. And he must have been wondering what the hell happened to me – which sane woman would exchange Manolo’s for trainers and posh bars for uni benches.
The change I went through really fascinates me and I often wonder how many people go through a big “personality” change. Especially within a shor time period.
Still, I must admit sometimes wonder if I like the person I have become….
Archive for March, 2009
Do we all change?
Tuesday, March 24th, 2009The Vienna Review – new website
Friday, March 20th, 2009The new Vienna Review website is on-line.
To check out my articles, go to:
http://www.viennareview.net/source/ana-tajder
For the site:
www.viennareview.net
……
Wednesday, March 18th, 2009A truth I have, very painfully, learned. Wish it were not so.
Most friends, in time, become as useless as relatives.
Jane Fonda in “Georgia Rule”
Killer Kids
Thursday, March 12th, 2009Yesterday, a German 17 years old boy killed 16 people. One day earlier, a USA boy killed 10. Few months before that, a kid killed 10 in Finland. We had more than 10 similar killings in past 15 years. What is this telling us about our “civilised” western society? Why is it only young men? Why were many of them on antidepressants? Why are all this men NOT coming from extremely poor or hard milieu? Why is Europe importing only shit from the USA?
Parents are working hard, are continuously under stress to buy more cars and more Nike shoes and make a “career”. Kids are stuck in nurseries when they are 3 months old and see the corpses of their parents in the evenings (sometimes not even that) or weekends. Then they are fed with antidepressants, play brutal computer games and watch rubbish TV. They lack joy, love, closeness and a real connection to life in all its beauty.
And then we wonder that they go nuts and start killing around.
We shouldn’t wonder.
It is not about having arms at home (BTW, why does a German businessman have 18 guns at home?).
It is about what our society has turned into. What our priorities are. And if we are able to be really truly happy and satisfied. To selflessly love. And to love life. And transport this feeling to our kids.
They are turning into angry, bloodthirsty, egoistic robots.
Thank you, “development”.
Happy Birthday, Bitch!
Monday, March 9th, 2009Barbie was born on 9 March 1959. Ruth Handler created her based on German dolls called Lilli. Up to now, 100 million meters of clothes were used for her wardrobe. If she were alive, Barbie would be a woman standing 2.13m tall with a waistline of 45.7cm and a bustling of 100cm. In fact, she would need to walk on all fours just to support her peculiar proportions (wouldn’t THEY like that?!). She would have deformed joints, problems with breathing and she would be infertile. 90% of girls aged 3-10 have at least one Barbie.
I won’t bitch about her on her birthday. Because let’s be honest – her name in the title of my book surely added to its success. So I should say: Thank you, Barbie. And in all that positive spirit, here my two favourite Barbie jokes:
A man walks into the toy store to get a Barbie doll for his daughter. So he asks the assistant, as you would, “How much is Barbie?”
“Well,” she says, “we have Barbie Goes to the Gym for $19.95, Barbie Goes to the Ball for $19.95, Barbie Goes Shopping for $19.95, Barbie Goes to the Beach for $19.95, Barbie Goes Nightclubbing for $19.95, and Divorced Barbie for $265.00.”
“Hey, hang on,” the guy asks, “why is Divorced Barbie $265.00 when all the others are only $19.95?”
“Yeah, well, it’s like this … Divorced Barbie comes with Ken’s house, Ken’s car, Ken’s boat, Ken’s furniture …”
……….
A little girl goes to see Santa Claus at the local shopping mall. When she arrives and sits down on Santa’s lap Santa asks “What do you want for Christmas little girl?”.
“I want a Barbie and a GI Joe” says the little girl.
“But Barbie comes with Ken” Santa says,
“No, Barbie only ‘cums’ with GI Joe!”
Sex & the City: The Recession
Friday, March 6th, 2009For all S&C fans, here’s an American journalist’s try to write a recession version of S&C. Am not sure if I find it funny, but hey – he gave it a shot, which is cool:
http://www.thedailybeast.com/blogs-and-stories/2009-03-04/sex-and-the-city-2-recessionistas/
Pink Ghetto
Thursday, March 5th, 2009This is absolutely one of the most hilarious ideas I have heard about in past years! Vienna is getting its first apartment house for – women. What the hell is an apartment house for women???!!! Well, even the team of women who came up with this idea doesn’t have a clue. Basically it is for women because only women can sign deals to buy/rent apartments in that house. Partners are of course welcome to live there with women. Can you imagine telling a man “Come visit me, I live in the pink women’s house.” Bet ya he won’t be able to get it up! And what happens if a woman dies and has a husband and a son? Do they need to go through a sex surgery for their inheritance?
The only concrete feature they came up with are – wider corridors in which women can meet to chat. Whaaaat??????!!!!!!!
I was trying to do the job of those brilliant minds which came up with this concept and tried to find one real positive aspect of living in a house for women. There is absolutely none. The only thing I came up with is that you can just knock on any door if you urgently need to borrow a tampon. And how often does that happen?
But then if you imagine the negative aspects… . Isn’t that house a paradise for burglers/rapers/stalkers? And marketiers? And what happens if something breaks down and you need a strong hand? Or in case of fire? And the worst of all things: Knowing that women’s cycles harmonise when they spend more time together, does the whole house go through a PMS together???
I don’t know, that shit is simply creepy.
The Managers & Nancy Pelosi’s Breasts
Wednesday, March 4th, 2009Today, I was thinking about the influence this crisis will have on the image of men. Because hey – they created the crisis! Especially those “winner” types: clever, strong, visionary…. fighters, winners, leaders. The MANAGERS. Will it move us more in the direction of…. the more handy men?
So I asked my friends on Twitter/Facebook (and formulated my question a bit too clumsy): Will it move the idea of ideal man away from suit and tie?
My favourite answer (to my stupid question): “I prefer them without clothes”
I agree. But then… am not sure if I really wanna see the CEO of AIG naked.
Anyway, if posed right, I think that the question is really interesting.
And my second thought of the day: God, it must be a hard job being Nancy Pelosi!!! I wonder how it must feel when a whole nation (or two or three) is staring at your breasts while they listen to their leader’s (too long) speeches?
I think that the camera in the House of Congress urgently needs to find a different angle. Save the poor woman!
Fairy Tale Horror
Tuesday, March 17th, 2009Just reading a (yet another) book about fairy tales: Sheldon Cashdan’s “The Witch Must Die (The Hidden Meaning of Fairy Tales)”. I found fascinating information on the original plots of our cute little classic fairy tales. They were FAR from cute in their original versions. And it is very interesting to see that in time, we softened our fairy tales but we invented horror somewhere else – in films and video games. And recently, reality.
Check the Sleeping beauty out:
While she was sleeping her 100 years sleep, the prince came, fell in love with her and – had sex with her. AND got her pregnant. “When he was through, he left the princess, and returned to his own kingdom, where, in the pressing business of his realm, he thought no more of the incident.” Still asleep, she gave birth to twins. Two fairies were taking care of the kids. But then, one of the children, unable to find the nipple, sucked on her finger, loosening the poison – and she woke up. Some time later, the prince did return to claim her and the children. But! By now, he was already married. When his wife found out about his infidelity, she invited the princess and her kids to visit her. And she instructed her cook to slay the kids and serve them to her husband for dinner. In the mean time, she lit a fire in the courtyard, planning to throw the princess into the flames. The story does have a happy end though – the cook spares the babies, the prince saves the princess from the fire and they throw his wife in instead. Hmmm, a fairy tale starring a corpse-raping prince and his cannibalistic wife?
And the Snow White? In its original version, the prince came, saw the Snow White in her glass coffin and liked her so much that he decided to take her home. Yet another corpse fanatic???
What will I find next? Alice eating the white bunny alive?
Tags: Commentary, Fairy Tales
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