Archive for August, 2010

Being a (European) blonde in New York

Thursday, August 19th, 2010

Sitting with Nic in metro, going downtown and looking at a poster advertising the “Bodies” exhibition, commenting how horrible the idea is of showing dead bodies playing volleyball.

Nic:”And what’s even worse – do you know where the bodies come from?”

Ana (blonde): “No”

Nic: “They’re Chinese dissidents.”

Ana (blonde): “OMG. That is horrible. And how did they get 2 million Chinese dissidents in one show?”

Nic: ” They can’t have 2 million bodies there. Where did you get the number from?”

Ana (blonde): “There, on the poster.”

Nic: “Where?”

Ana (blonde): “Big red letters.”

Nic: “That’s a phone number.”

Well, how embarrassing (and stupid) is that!?

So, if you want to go see dead bodies of Chinese dissidents in NY, dial 1.800.000.BODIES

And don’t be disappointed with how few corpses there are!

Barbie in New York

Monday, August 16th, 2010

I’m very excited to announce that I’m going to have a reading in New York:

Wednesday, 25 August 2010, 19:00

Bluestockings Bookstore

172 Allen St.
New York, NY 10002

Link: Bluestocking Events

The Pilot

Wednesday, August 11th, 2010

Here the last few lines from my book “From Barbie to Vibrator”:

The book brought me back to life.

But then, there was silence. And it lasted for a few days.

Patrick called first: “I knew it! It is all about Propella, Propella! It should have been called Propella Follies and not Laudonplace Follies!”  Beware of furious French Queens!

Siggi called next: “We read it, it is magnificent! It must be published!”

Then, Marcus called from Australia, totally excited: “We had such a sexy pilot on the flight! And he is STRAIGHT! During the whole flight, he was reading your book! He asked if all those sex things are true! He wants to meet you!”

At first, I liked the idea of meeting the pilot. Especially if he is still wearing his uniform. But then I imagined a plain crash in a jungle and somebody finding my book on pilot’s lap….. Oooops!

Message to all pilots:

Please, read my books in your hotel room. And for heaven’s sake, don’t take that uniform off! Wait until I am there! And yes, the sex parts are true.

Ah, I really like the idea of publishing this book

I’m doing this because yesterday, I heard shocking news that the pilot from this story, the last character in my book, died in a car crash couple of days ago. I heard he was handsome, charming and very professional. He was in his early forties and had one child. I never met him (the character Ana is not Ana) but I was deeply shocked about this news. A character from my book has died.

It is a strange feeling. Sad.

And I hate sounding kitschy, but I’m happy that with those few sentences, I was able grant him yet one more dimension of eternity.

RIP.

Where’s my bride?

Monday, August 2nd, 2010

Today in the morning, the cleaning lady in my office showed me pictures from a wedding in a small village somewhere in Serbia she had just returned from. A very amusing experience.

Cleaning lady: “This is me and this is my husband, my son, daughter, cousin, mother of the bride….”

Ana: “Oh, mother of the bride looks young!”

Cleaning lady: “Yea, she’s 37 – got married with 16.”

Ana: silent shock (Aaaaaaaa, if the bride was 1 year younger I would be mother of the bride!!!!!! I cannot possibly be mother of the bride!!!!!! Even worse – I could already be a grandmother!!!)

What a nice way to start a week.

I hope you had a better one.